Don't Settle: How to Stay Smart in Matters of the Heart - Relationship Advice for Women | Perfect for Self-Help & Personal Growth

I loved this book. I've been an avid reader of psychology, esp focused on relationships/sex for some time and still found this book wonderfully written and refreshing. (For the record, I was not familiar with the author prior to reading this, never seen her shows or anything. So I came into it with no pre-existing opinions of her.) I originally bought this book right as I began a new relationship, my first in several years after taking time to find myself and get clear on what I wanted in a lifelong partnership. I ended up taking time off from reading so by time I got around to actually digging into it, I'd been with this person for about two months and was honestly a little worried the book would bring about unprovoked doubts. I was very curious about it and decided to give it a go anyways. Happy to say I was so very pleasantly surprised!The author has a great voice in her writing and references her own experiences as well as some of what she's seen in her career with other couples. What I really liked though is that she wrote the book in a thoughtful, very COMPLETE format both in content and in organization of that content. I was worried it would be overly single-girl, feminist focused and more aimed at deterring women away from negative relationships than necessarily speaking to or encouraging those that have begun relationships. (Which in itself is not inheritently a negative thing. Women—or people in general—do need to be more conscientious of the people they date and aware of the signs that we like to ignore when we are attracted to someone. I was just concerned that for me as a newly partnered person, it would have me focusing on negative aspects.) However, this was not the case. She was very holistic in her approach to the topic and covered it in a kind, direct manner, truly focused on helping the reader find a compatible, loving companion (the "right" person for them, which I only say in quotes because I believe this doesn't mean one specific soulmate but rather one of any number of people that could mesh together in happy, healthy, loving relationship); this means not only how to weed out the bad ones but find what you as an individual are looking for AND how to cultivate that relationship—manifest it, if you will—into something that is long lasting (i.e. treating your partner with love and respect, expecting the same in return, understanding healthy sacrifice and compromise without sacrificing your values/self-respect, etc).Just overall very well written and great read, both in content and in just enjoyment. She is funny, witty, and honest, three things that I greatly value in authors.My one VERY minor...pet peeves is too strong but thing I noticed is there is a slight perspective focus towards specifically black women (referencing some specific situations that convey this as well as referencing mainly women of color as far as noteworthy examples — Opera, Michelle Obama, etc). This is not surprising in the least considering the author herself is a successful, powerful woman of color, and I don't at all judge since this is written from her perspective and voice. But just something I notice. (Just to note, I notice the same for the reverse in authors who are white, as well as other aspects such as those who are of different sexual orientation or societal level. This is not pointed out as a negative by any means. It's wonderful to hear authors speak in ways that define them as human beings, that's how we connect to each other. Just like I connect to her speaking as a strong woman of ambitious nature. I simply mention this as a fact. Women of color may connect more with these aspects whereas women who are not may not.)10/5 stars. Everyone would benefit from reading this, woman or not.